Rage...

I just cant confine the burning rage inside of me...

It's so hard to control...

I've just smashed things up in the lockerroom.... It's great to finally feel the pain of my knucles... this is the only real experience i had recently...

It's so hard to bear the disappointed look from my patient... i didnt intentionally fracture the root for Christ sake... I would not be that nonsense to risk my whole career such that i can see you suffer... that's totally nonsense..... I am the one suffering all the blame...

I became a bit scary of myself lately.... Who's this guy? Where is the guy i use to know...

I use to be the one pointing out all the (smarty-assedly-thought) mistake the seniors made..... but till i grew in age.... i realize sometimes it's not the best call to make every right decision...

I just dont know how to put myself in other's shoes and think... You're not be, you wont realize how hard i am trying; how much i am suffering; how good i am doing.....

Really been through too much troble lately...

Have some signs of dementia lately... mood swifts... too easily irritated... I guess i will really go mad someday....

Sorry to my floormates... I tried my best to come back for the floor orientation... but somehow i just failed...

Suddenly wanted to slit my wrist open..... just want to see how much it bleeds...

I must be going crazy...